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Swerds of Dewm is a new guild on The Tribunal. The purpose of the guild is to gather friends into one big irritating chat channel when they feel like taking time off from their mains. We don't recruit people. Decka out, LOLOLOL.

This is also the place for the Aug List in case you wanna check it out.
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Ende, Sep 3, 07 5:18 AM.
Christ how long has it been, like 8 months? I never found time to update in between trying to drink 30 beers in one day, driving scissor lifts off curbs, and raiding like a goddamn animal. Well, I just finished a stale 40 and it feels like update-thirty.

In between this and the last, I've seen not one but TWO(2) server transfers. I spent 6 months raiding with euros and insomniac Americans(both completely insane) on Antonius Bayle only to end up on Maelin Starypyre just a month ago. Lancing made an oh so eloquent comment about my transience.

No alternate text supplied.

He's really quite witty when he's not highsunning fabled raid mobs. LOLOLOL! I'll get to that later.

BUT FIRST

Tribunal adventures took place the other night in grand scale. Everyone needs a goddamn human crown so Kaas Thox Xi Aten Ha Ra had to go. The available force was slim. We had Gegoelf Jones, the divebombing doomhammer, Littlefoot a.k.a. The Brave Little Toaster, and myself in the guise of Konon the Druid Karate. Mind you, I've no goddamn clue how to play a druid. It was bound to be interesting. Miran.

No alternate text supplied.

The fight lasted a little over 51 minutes. Yes, Gego is using a shield. I purpled him three times. He was raised by AE Snakeman, what the fuck do you expect?

No human crowns, he dropped straight up garbage. The other one died the next night with twice the force and dropped two Rings of Resistance though! They went to both of the men listed in this here photosnap. Well done fuckers. That shit was intense.

So, back to the Lancing thing. Well, besides that statement being minorly hypocritical for him being on Povar(The Armpit of Everquest Servers), he did indeed do a little highsunning... as a matter of proxy. I'll start from the beginning.

Since the server mergers, different server "cultures", if you will, collided with one another. Tribunal + Ayonae Ro were polar opposites, but both poppuli(save the obvious exceptions) shared one thing in common. Everyone hates Rest In Peace. Aside from the Macroquesting, training, and guild poaching, they're a collective group of bleeding vaginas that ought to be euthanized.

Anyway. about 4 months ago during Fabled, a pickup raid on Tribunal was happening on Fabled Vex Thal, and with great success. Lancing, Jecour, and Zapali were there and winning loot like madmen. I was on my euro server screwing around in The Buried Sea just begging I was there. Lancing suddenly has to log and tells me to bot him in the raid. SCORE LOL!

I log in and learn how to play a bard in about 15 seconds and start clearing the rest of the god forsaken trash. Word finally gets around to me that Rest In Peace is leaving a trail of menstrual fluid just behind us. Of course you can sense what these dumb fuckers are after. We engage and wipe about 30% in, so my buddy Coas gets on the batphone and calls up a slew of reinforcements and we prepare to CoH them up, but before you could say "shitty fabled loot" guess who ports into the prep room and zerging AHR? Yeah.

Now before any of you douchebags say "Quit whining Ende, that shit happens all the time. What about that time you snaked Goats from VA?"... well... you're an idiot. You see, there are these certain NPC's in Vex Thal called Akhevan Warders. If you aggro them, they insta port you to the zone in. You despawn them by killing certain named in VT and thus allow you progress further through the zone. Similarly, if any of them are still up, and you manage to get to AHR, she will DT you upon aggro'ing her. This pickup raid despawned the warders thus making AHR engageable, and thus have rights to AHR until they leave the zone.

Onward. They engage and we're mad as hell. What ensued in the next 5-10 minutes made me laugh so goddamn hard that I'll let the logs do the talking. No screenshots here, I wish I had though!

First of all...

[Wed Apr 04 21:00:43 2007] Beginning to memorize Song of Highsun...

OH YES! And then...

[Wed Apr 04 21:01:46 2007] The Fabled Aten Ha Ra Gates.

LOLOLOLOL!!!

[Wed Apr 04 21:02:14 2007] Zapali tells you, 'Thats so wrong'
[Wed Apr 04 21:02:15 2007] Mirrii says out of character, 'wtf?'
[Wed Apr 04 21:02:37 2007] Maelin.Shefler told you, 'dont stop highsunning it'
[Wed Apr 04 21:02:38 2007] Vekaras tells you, 'screenshotting that. have logs'
[Wed Apr 04 21:03:13 2007] Ickulus tells the raid,  'no one better be doing ANYTHING to that mob'
[Wed Apr 04 21:08:38 2007] Maelin.Shefler told you, 'are you highsunning their mob you rapscallion'

Then my good friend Garrfield receives a wonderful idea...

[Wed Apr 04 21:09:52 2007] Garrfield tells you, 'im so gating it at 10&PCT;'

Which will regenerate AHR to 33% health everytime it happens. Brilliant.

[Wed Apr 04 21:14:48 2007] The Fabled Aten Ha Ra Gates.
[Wed Apr 04 21:14:58 2007] You told Garrfield, 'LOLOLOL'
[Wed Apr 04 21:15:03 2007] Vitorbelfort says out of character, 'tisk tisk'
[Wed Apr 04 21:15:05 2007] Mirrii says out of character, 'GM inc, grats '
[Wed Apr 04 21:15:13 2007] Garrfield tells you, 'HAHAHA'

And once more

[Wed Apr 04 21:22:13 2007] Filtiky tells the raid,  '11&PCT; but slowing down'
[Wed Apr 04 21:22:35 2007] Garrfield tells you, 'LOL'
[Wed Apr 04 21:22:36 2007] Jecour tells the raid,  '33&PCT;'
[Wed Apr 04 21:22:37 2007] Vitorbelfort says out of character, 'i cant believe that '
[Wed Apr 04 21:22:40 2007] You told Garrfield, 'LOL'
[Wed Apr 04 21:22:53 2007] Raytes says out of character, 'Garrfield will be petitioning to have you banned with screenshots'
[Wed Apr 04 21:23:07 2007] Vitorbelfort says out of character, 'i got them too'
[Wed Apr 04 21:23:11 2007] You declined the request to be translocated.

BANNED WITH SCREENSHOTS! OH CHRIST!

[Wed Apr 04 21:23:36 2007] Players in EverQuest:
[Wed Apr 04 21:23:36 2007] ---------------------------

[Wed Apr 04 21:23:36 2007] * GM-Admin *[60 Warlord (Warrior)] Hruap (Human)  ZONE: bazaar 
[Wed Apr 04 21:23:36 2007] There is 1 player in EverQuest.
[Wed Apr 04 21:23:43 2007] Jecour tells swerds:1, 'it's funny to see them counter their own argument'
[Wed Apr 04 21:24:12 2007] Eclipses says out of character, 'whats going on here? wasnt a PU raid killing Aten??? how did RIP come and take it?'
[Wed Apr 04 21:24:16 2007] Zapali tells swerds:1, 'Instnatly a GM is on'
[Wed Apr 04 21:24:19 2007] Vekaras says out of character, 'you wiped'
[Wed Apr 04 21:24:24 2007] Raytes says out of character, 'because the pick up raid wiped and didnt have the force?'
[Wed Apr 04 21:24:24 2007] Vitorbelfort says out of character, 'fair game'
[Wed Apr 04 21:24:46 2007] Coas says out of character, 'we had other people coming anyway'
[Wed Apr 04 21:24:48 2007] Raytes says out of character, 'we backed off all day and let the pickup raid clear VT...yall fizzled out on Aten and we stepped in...why are you bein so mean? =/'
[Wed Apr 04 21:24:49 2007] Qalaar says out of character, 'are we really discussing 4 year old rules of engagement ?  REALLY ? !'
[Wed Apr 04 21:24:50 2007] Eclipses says out of character, 'so whats everyone talking about now?'
[Wed Apr 04 21:25:11 2007] Starrla says, 'fastie ~ Allamar'
[Wed Apr 04 21:25:12 2007] Vekaras says out of character, 'we played fair. we let you have your shot then we engaged. you're highsuning and dispelling our mob. '
[Wed Apr 04 21:25:35 2007] Garrfield says out of character, 'my favorite color is blue'
[Wed Apr 04 21:25:59 2007] Coas says out of character, 'lol why are we being so mean? well lets see here, we have been clearing the zone for 7 hours (before your raid time, so you weren't waiting around all day for us) then as we are getting a few more people to kill this, OHH here comes rip to save the day and take it!'
[Wed Apr 04 21:26:16 2007] Coas says out of character, 'classsssy'
[Wed Apr 04 21:39:04 2007] Rauel tells you, 'REST IN PEACE USES MACROQUEST FUCK THEM ALL'

Then I get the fuck out of there and get back to my euro shenanigans. Lancing gets back and asks about the end of the raid.

[Wed Apr 04 22:05:03 2007] Tribunal.Lancing tells Tribunal.swerds:1, 'ende what did you win me'
[Wed Apr 04 22:05:09 2007] Tribunal.Zapali tells Tribunal.swerds:1, 'Nothing'
[Wed Apr 04 22:05:15 2007] Tribunal.Zapali tells Tribunal.swerds:1, 'He high sunned AHR and we wiped'
[Wed Apr 04 22:05:27 2007] Tribunal.Lancing tells Tribunal.swerds:1, 'what'
[Wed Apr 04 22:05:28 2007] Tribunal.Lancing tells Tribunal.swerds:1, 'lol'
[Wed Apr 04 22:06:05 2007] Tribunal.Zapali tells Tribunal.swerds:1, 'No Im not lieing'
[Wed Apr 04 22:06:07 2007] Tribunal.Zapali tells Tribunal.swerds:1, 'But we wiped'
[Wed Apr 04 22:06:14 2007] Tribunal.Lancing tells Tribunal.swerds:1, 'he high sunned it?'
[Wed Apr 04 22:06:20 2007] Tribunal.Zapali tells Tribunal.swerds:1, 'Then RiP took AHR'
[Wed Apr 04 22:06:27 2007] Tribunal.Zapali tells Tribunal.swerds:1, 'And Ende High sunned it at like 75&PCT;'
[Wed Apr 04 22:06:35 2007] Tribunal.Zapali tells Tribunal.swerds:1, 'Then the other abrd did it twice at 10&PCT;'
[Wed Apr 04 22:06:39 2007] Tribunal.Lancing tells Tribunal.swerds:1, 'you are lying right'
[Wed Apr 04 22:06:39 2007] Tribunal.Zapali tells Tribunal.swerds:1, 'And it jumped too30&PCT;'
[Wed Apr 04 22:08:36 2007] You tell tribunal.swerds:1, 'Lancing'
[Wed Apr 04 22:08:40 2007] Tribunal.Lancing tells Tribunal.swerds:1, 'ende you're a jackass'
[Wed Apr 04 22:08:46 2007] You tell tribunal.swerds:1, 'Lancing don't be mad'
[Wed Apr 04 22:08:52 2007] Tribunal.Lancing tells Tribunal.swerds:1, 'brb to change pw lol'
[Wed Apr 04 22:08:55 2007] You tell tribunal.swerds:1, 'ok so we wiped and RiP engaged'
[Wed Apr 04 22:08:58 2007] Tribunal.Zapali tells Tribunal.swerds:1, 'LANCING DONT BE MAD'
[Wed Apr 04 22:08:59 2007] You tell tribunal.swerds:1, 'WAIT HEAR MY STORY LOL'
[Wed Apr 04 22:09:01 2007] You tell tribunal.swerds:1, 'WAIT HEAR MY STORY LOL'
[Wed Apr 04 22:09:03 2007] Tribunal.Lancing tells Tribunal.swerds:1, 'what'
[Wed Apr 04 22:09:06 2007] You tell tribunal.swerds:1, 'Lancing please'
[Wed Apr 04 22:09:09 2007] You tell tribunal.swerds:1, 'RiP engaged'
[Wed Apr 04 22:09:13 2007] You tell tribunal.swerds:1, 'and I memmed highsun'
[Wed Apr 04 22:09:41 2007] You tell tribunal.swerds:1, 'and I started highsunning it but I was like "nah that's mean" and I ducked and turned around to look at something on my friend's computer'
[Wed Apr 04 22:09:47 2007] You tell tribunal.swerds:1, 'then I turned back and AHR WAS BACK AT THE SPAWN LOL'
[Wed Apr 04 22:09:50 2007] Tribunal.Lancing tells Tribunal.swerds:1, 'ende'
[Wed Apr 04 22:09:54 2007] Tribunal.Lancing tells Tribunal.swerds:1, 'ducking doenst end bard songs'
[Wed Apr 04 22:09:55 2007] You tell tribunal.swerds:1, 'I WAS LIKE SHIT LOL'
[Wed Apr 04 22:10:00 2007] You tell tribunal.swerds:1, 'yeah I know that now'
[Wed Apr 04 22:10:02 2007] Tribunal.Zapali tells Tribunal.swerds:1, 'Yeah he found out rofl'
[Wed Apr 04 22:10:10 2007] You tell tribunal.swerds:1, 'and then Garrfield Highsunned it twice at 10&PCT; and they wiped'
[Wed Apr 04 22:10:20 2007] Tribunal.Lancing tells Tribunal.swerds:1, 'thats stupid'
[Wed Apr 04 22:10:28 2007] You tell tribunal.swerds:1, 'and Vekeras told me he screenshotted it and was going to ban me(Lancing this is the part where you don't get mad)'
[Wed Apr 04 22:10:32 2007] Tribunal.Zapali tells Tribunal.swerds:1, 'Then he didnt fade and got you killed because they trained AHR into the prep room'
[Wed Apr 04 22:10:39 2007] Tribunal.Lancing tells Tribunal.swerds:1, 'god damn it ende'
[Wed Apr 04 22:10:45 2007] You tell tribunal.swerds:1, 'and then Trikki told me that she "swayed the attention away from me, that Lancing wouldn't do something like that"'
[Wed Apr 04 22:10:57 2007] Tribunal.Lancing tells Tribunal.swerds:1, 'jesus fuck ende'
[Wed Apr 04 22:11:01 2007] You tell tribunal.swerds:1, 'Lancing calm down'
[Wed Apr 04 22:11:13 2007] You tell tribunal.swerds:1, 'Lancing who is Trikki'

HAHAHAHA! Yeah, at this point I felt a tad guilty. Lancing created a hiiiiilarious thread on the RiP forums where they understood that it wasn't him, after which he made amends with me and ceased to give a shit. RiP then swore to get me deguilded from whatever guild I was in(I've been in so many I can't remember LOL), but they found themselves to be wholly impotent in the entire situation, even with that GM dick pressed against their tonsils. From what I'm told, they re-engaged and killed it and got their silly sub-par loot after way too much foul play and effort. Congrats fuckers, enjoy limping through mid-end Everquest content.

That's all kids. I'm going to read my sappy love novel and sleep for the rest of the day.

AE Snakeman Out

Jecour, May 17, 07 9:19 PM.
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